RAY & ETHAN’S GOLF APOCALYPSE ⛳💥
(A chaos explosion involving golf carts, flying balls, and two idiots who
definitely should not be on a golf course.)
🏌️ CHAPTER 1: “LET’S TEE
OFF, PEOPLE!”
It was a sunny Saturday morning. Birds were chirping. Grass
was glistening. And somewhere in the peaceful countryside, an unsuspecting golf
course was about to suffer severe property damage.
“Eighteen holes of golf, baby!” Ethan shouted, swinging his
club dramatically.
Amy adjusted her visor. “Remember—this is a friendly
match.”
Lucy smiled politely. “Yes, and
please don’t break anything this time.”
Ray showed up late, wearing neon shorts, sunglasses shaped
like lightning bolts, and holding his club backward. “LET’S TEE OFF, PEOPLE!”
Amy blinked. “Ray… that’s a broom.”
Ray looked down. “Oh. So that’s why it felt weird.”
Ethan sighed. “We’re doomed already.”
⛳ CHAPTER 2: HOLE ONE — THE
LEGEND OF RAY’S FIRST SWING
Lucy teed off first—smooth, powerful, perfect. The ball
soared beautifully into the distance.
Amy followed—clean hit, just a bit short.
Then came Ethan. He twirled his club like a pro, lined up,
and whacked the ball. It went dead straight and landed inches
from the hole.
Ray clapped. “DUDE! THAT WAS AMAZING!”
Ethan smirked. “It’s all in the wrist.”
Then it was Ray’s turn.
He cracked his knuckles, took a dramatic stance, swung with
all his might—
—and missed completely.
WHOOSH.
Lucy coughed. “You… missed the ball.”
Ray nodded. “I was just warming up the air.”
Second try—he hit it!
But not the ball.
His club flew out of his hands, spiraling into the pond.
Amy screamed. “RAY!”
Ray shrugged. “Water hazard. Technically counts.”
🦆 CHAPTER 3: DUCK
INVASION
While retrieving his club from the pond, Ray accidentally
disturbed a family of ducks.
They exploded out of the water, quacking furiously, chasing
him down the fairway.
“HELP! THEY’RE ANGRY!” Ray yelled, sprinting with his club
above his head.
Ethan was laughing so hard he fell over. “Bro’s getting birded!”
Amy tried to shoo the ducks away with her hat. “Ray, stop
running in circles!”
Ray screamed, “THEY’RE FORMING A "V" !”
Lucy calmly chipped her ball onto the green while absolute chaos unfolded behind her. “I’m still counting that as a par.”
LLoC Quotes
“Remember—this is a friendly match.”... “Yes, and please don’t break anything this time.”
“You… missed the ball.”...“I was just warming up the air.”
“HELP! THEY’RE ANGRY!” ...“Bro’s getting birded!”
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