The next morning,
the kids woke up inside the Decepticon base to the sound of a metallic alarm
that felt like it was vibrating their spines out of their bodies.
BWAAAAAAMMMMP.
BWAAAAAAMMMMP.
Ethan shot up.
“Bro—are we under attack?!”
Ray rubbed his
eyes.
“Or is Megatron singing again?”
Amy peeked out the door.
“It’s worse.”
Lucy groaned.
“He scheduled… training.”
Standing in the hallway, Megatron loomed proudly like a
disappointed gym coach.
“GOOD MORNING, TINY RECRUITS. TODAY YOU BEGIN YOUR JOURNEY
TO BECOME—”
He paused for maximum drama.
“—FUNCTIONALLY USEFUL.”
Ray: “Nah we’re doomed.”
1. ORIENTATION VIDEO (Rated PG for ‘Probably Ghastly’)
Megatron ushered them into what looked like a movie theater…
if movie theaters had:
- scorch
marks
- melted
chairs
- “NO
BLASTER USE DURING SHOW” signs
A projector flickered to life.
Starscream appeared on screen cheerfully.
“HELLO NEW RECRUITS! WELCOME TO THE DECEPTICONS! Rule #1: Do
NOT believe anything Megatron says about me—”
Megs slammed a metal fist onto the console.
“SKIP.”
The video jumped to:
“Rule #27: NEVER push the big red button.”
Ray immediately whispered: “We pushing that button later.”
Ethan: “Obviously.”
Amy: “No we are NOT.”
Lucy: “We absolutely are.”
Megatron folded his arms.
“YOU WILL LEARN NOTHING FROM THIS VIDEO. IT WAS CREATED BY HR.”
On-screen Starscream held up a chart upside-down while
saying, “Teamwork makes the dream work!” before tripping over a traffic cone.
Megatron covered his eyes.
“I HATE THIS VIDEO.”
LLoC Quotes
“Bro—are we under attack?!”...“Or is Megatron singing again?”...“It’s worse.”...“He scheduled… training.”
Rule #1: Do NOT believe anything Megatron says about me—”
“YOU WILL LEARN NOTHING FROM THIS VIDEO. IT WAS CREATED BY HR.”
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